In 2025, pati patni jokes continue to spread smiles and laughter across every home. These jokes are a timeless part of Indian comedy culture, delivering humorous takes on married life. Whether you’re newly married or celebrating a silver jubilee, these funny husband wife jokes hit the right chord. With a blend of light sarcasm, wit, and everyday realities, they tickle the funny bone without crossing boundaries. Pati Patni Jokes.
These jokes are perfect for social media sharing, adding fun to family gatherings, or lightening up daily life. From classic punchlines to modern-day humor, married couple jokes never fail to amuse.
As humor evolves with time, so does the creativity behind these puns. This collection covers a wide range of situations every partners can relate to. Dive into this massive list and enjoy a hearty laugh with our 501+ pati patni jokes crafted for 2025.
1. Pati Patni Jokes for Everyday Life
- Patni: Tumhe har waqt phone se fursat mile toh baat karun.
Pati: Tumse baat karne se accha phone hi dekh lu. - Pati: Khana banao.
Patni: Rasode mein kaun tha?
Pati: Main nahi tha! - Patni: Mere liye kya laaye ho?
Pati: Tumhare liye khud ki salary chhod aaya hoon. - Pati: Tumhare bina main kuch bhi nahi hoon.
Patni: Waise bhi tum kuch khaas toh ho nahi. - Patni: Har baar main hi kyu maafi maangu?
Pati: Kyunki tum galat ho! - Pati: Tumhara mood har waqt off kyu hota hai?
Patni: Tumhare wajah se! - Patni: Mujhe kuch romantic sunao.
Pati: Bijli ka bill time pe bhar diya hai. - Pati: Tumhara gussa mujhe maar dalega.
Patni: Toh jaldi mar jao! - Patni: Tumne mere liye kya sacrifice kiya?
Pati: Freedom! - Pati: Tum mujhe jhel kaise leti ho?
Patni: TV dekh kar ignore karti hoon. - Patni: Har baat mein taana kyu maarte ho?
Pati: Kya karu, tum target ho! - Pati: Tumse shaadi meri zindagi ki sabse badi galti thi.
Patni: Mere liye bhi ek punishment hai. - Patni: Khaana acha laga?
Pati: Haan, lekin hospital ka address de do. - Pati: Tum kuch bhi nahi samajhti.
Patni: Isliye toh tumse shaadi ki! - Patni: Tum mujhe samajhne ki koshish karo.
Pati: Phir toh mujhe psychiatrist banna padega. - Pati: Tum mujhe ignore karti ho.
Patni: Tum notice bhi karte ho? - Patni: Har baar tum hi sahi kaise ho sakte ho?
Pati: Experience! - Pati: Tum mujhe pyaar karti ho ya nahi?
Patni: Condition apply! - Patni: Tumhara dimaag kahaan rehta hai?
Pati: Tumhare jhagde mein kho gaya. - Pati: Tumhe jokes pasand aate hai?
Patni: Jab tum bolte ho, wahi toh joke lagta hai.
Read More: Mokka Jokes 2025
2. Romantic Pati Patni Jokes

- Patni: Tum mujhe kitna pyaar karte ho?
Pati: Utna jitna tum shopping karti ho! - Pati: Tumhari muskaan meri duniya hai.
Patni: Duniya ko EMI par liya hai kya? - Patni: Tumhare dil mein mere liye jagah hai?
Pati: Tumhare gusse ke liye bhi room bana rakha hai. - Pati: Main tumhare bina jee nahi sakta.
Patni: Toh jaake gas cylinder le aao. - Patni: Mujhe har waqt surprise chahiye.
Pati: Electricity bill dekh lo, har baar surprise hota hai. - Patni: Tum mujhe chhod ke toh nahi jaoge?
Pati: Nahi, daily office jaata hoon, wapas bhi aata hoon. - Pati: Tum meri jaan ho.
Patni: Toh fir jaan se kyun maarte ho har baat pe? - Patni: Mujhe kuch romantic sunao.
Pati: Fridge mein cake rakha hai. - Pati: Tere bina sab suna suna lagta hai.
Patni: Tumhare jokes bhi waise hi lagte hai. - Patni: Tumhare liye main kya hoon?
Pati: Ek permanent headache! - Pati: Tum mere dil mein ho.
Patni: Dil ki bypass surgery karani padegi! - Patni: Aaj kuch special karke dikhao.
Pati: Chai mein biscuit bina tode dikhaya tha kal. - Pati: Tum meri zindagi ho.
Patni: Insurance kara liya? - Patni: Mujhe chocolates pasand hai.
Pati: Budget mein nahi hai sweetheart. - Pati: Aaj ka din sirf tumhare naam.
Patni: Bill bhi tumhare naam likhwa do. - Patni: Tum romance bhool gaye ho.
Pati: Tumhara monthly budget yaad hai! - Pati: Tum mujhe jaan se pyaari ho.
Patni: Toh jaan kyu nikal dete ho roz? - Patni: Mujhe candle light dinner chahiye.
Pati: Bijli ka bill time pe bhar do pehle. - Pati: Tumhari smile meri battery hai.
Patni: Tabhi toh tum low power mode mein rehte ho! - Patni: Mujhe har waqt compliments chahiye.
Pati: Tum budget mein nahi aati ho, fir bhi pyaari lagti ho.
3. Pati Patni Nok-Jhok Jokes

- Pati: Tumse shaadi kar ke galti ki.
Patni: Toh divorce kar lo, meri bhi zindagi khush ho. - Patni: Tum mujhe roz taana marte ho.
Pati: Taana hi toh mara, thappad nahi! - Pati: Har baat pe argue kyun karti ho?
Patni: Toh kya sirf tum hi lawyer ho? - Patni: Har waqt complain hi karte ho.
Pati: Toh tareef ke layak kuch karo! - Pati: Tumhara logic zero hai.
Patni: Tumhara patience minus hai. - Patni: Tumse baat karke headache ho gaya.
Pati: Tumse baat karke zindagi se bharosa uth gaya. - Pati: Tum har waqt chillati kyun ho?
Patni: Kyunki tum sunte nahi ho! - Patni: Main roti hoon toh bhi tum kuch nahi bolte.
Pati: Kyunki khushi se rota nahi koi. - Pati: Tumhara gussa kisi din nuclear war karwa dega.
Patni: Toh pehle helmet le aao! - Patni: Har baar galti meri kyu hoti hai?
Pati: Kyunki tum expert ho! - Pati: Tum mujhe ignore karti ho.
Patni: Tumse baat kar ke kya Nobel milega? - Patni: Tumhara sense of humor bakwaas hai.
Pati: Toh hans kyun padti ho? - Pati: Tum mujhe har waqt dominate karti ho.
Patni: Tumse handle hi nahi hota main. - Patni: Tumne meri feelings kabhi samjhi?
Pati: Feelings ko filter kar diya tha. - Pati: Tum shopping list kabhi nahi bhoolti.
Patni: Tumhara birthday toh bhoolne layak hai. - Patni: Tum late kyun aaye?
Pati: Tumse milne ka mann nahi tha. - Pati: Tumhare jokes khatarnak hote hain.
Patni: Tumhara chehra aur bhi zyada. - Patni: Tumhare bina bhi main reh sakti hoon.
Pati: Prove it! - Pati: Tum kaam kyu nahi karti?
Patni: Tum dekhte toh ho nahi! - Patni: Tum ghar ke kaam me haath nahi batate.
Pati: Haath toh main sirf remote uthane ke liye banaya hoon.
4. Husband Wife Jokes on Money
- Patni: Tumhari salary kahaan jaati hai?
Pati: Tumhare wardrobe mein. - Pati: Tumhara shopping budget itna zyada kyun hai?
Patni: Tumhari akal itni kam kyun hai? - Patni: Tum mujhe paisa nahi dete.
Pati: Tumhe paisa chahiye ya husband? - Pati: Savings ka kya plan hai?
Patni: Tumhare jaane ke baad bataungi. - Patni: Mujhe naya phone chahiye.
Pati: Pehle purane bills bhar do. - Pati: Budget tight hai.
Patni: Toh jeans bhi tight le aayi hoon. - Patni: Paisa khatam ho gaya.
Pati: Tumhara ATM mode kab bandh hoga? - Pati: Tumhare expenses kam nahi hote.
Patni: Tumhare expectations ka kya? - Patni: Ghar ke kharche ka hisaab do.
Pati: Sab tumhari khushi mein chala gaya. - Pati: Naya fridge le lein?
Patni: Pehle EMI purani khatam hone de. - Patni: Har mahine shopping kyu?
Pati: Har mahine tumhari shakal toh nahi badalti! - Pati: Tumhara makeup kit budget se zyada hai.
Patni: Tumhara shampoo bhi toh free mein nahi aata! - Patni: Main apne liye kuch bhi nahi leti.
Pati: Bas mall ki receipt mat dikhana. - Pati: Aaj khane mein kya banaya?
Patni: Budget friendly khichdi. - Patni: Mujhe branded kapde chahiye.
Pati: Bank balance bhi branded nahi hai! - Pati: Ghar ka kharcha badh gaya.
Patni: Tumhara mood bhi to mehenga hai. - Patni: EMI bharni hai.
Pati: Tumhari shopping EMI ban gayi hai. - Pati: Tum paisa ka dhyan nahi rakhti.
Patni: Tum hi accountant ho! - Patni: Online sale chal rahi hai.
Pati: Mere dil pe bhi sale lagi hai. - Pati: Tumse shaadi mehengi pad gayi.
Patni: Return policy nahi hoti!
5. Pati Patni Jokes on Daily Routine
- Pati: Subah uthte hi chillana zaroori hai kya?
Patni: Alarm ki jagah tum hi ho. - Patni: Har roz wohi chai, wohi biscuit!
Pati: Har roz wahi shakal, wohi gussa! - Pati: Aaj kya banaya?
Patni: Tumhare jaise feeka dal! - Patni: Tumhara routine boring hai.
Pati: Tumhara calendar bhi frightening hai. - Pati: Tum subah uth kar mujhe dekhti ho?
Patni: Mood kharab karne ke liye zaroor dekhti hoon. - Patni: Tum toothpaste ka dhakkan kab band karoge?
Pati: Jab tum fridge ka darwaza band karna sikho. - Pati: Breakfast ready nahi hua ab tak?
Patni: Shaadi tumne ki thi, chef se nahi. - Patni: Subah tumhare socks dhoondhne se thak gayi hoon.
Pati: Shaadi mein dowry mein socks box nahi mila tha kya? - Pati: Tumhe har roz shopping ka plan hota hai?
Patni: Tumhe har roz complaint ka! - Patni: Tumhara brush kaha gaya?
Pati: Tumhare makeup drawer mein kho gaya. - Pati: Ghar ke kaam main bhi kar sakta hoon.
Patni: Pehle kar ke toh dikhao. - Patni: Tum kabhi help nahi karte.
Pati: Tum kabhi thank you nahi bolti. - Pati: Tum lunch box mein hamesha sabzi hi deti ho.
Patni: Tum wife se chef chahte ho? - Pati: Tumhara time management zero hai.
Patni: Tumhara laziness 100 mein 100! - Patni: Tum news sunte hi gussa kyun ho jaate ho?
Pati: Tumhari awaz background mein hoti hai. - Patni: Tumhara phone hi sabse important hai?
Pati: Tumhara TV remote sabse pyara hai! - Patni: Tumhare kapde idhar-udhar milte hain.
Pati: Tumhare dialogues har jagah milte hain. - Pati: Subah-subah bhajan kyun sunte ho?
Patni: Tumhare jhagdo se to accha hai! - Patni: Tum mujhe miss karte ho din bhar?
Pati: Sirf lunch mein achi sabzi ho tab. - Pati: Tum time par kabhi ready kyun nahi hoti?
Patni: Tum time par impress kab karte ho?
6. Comedy Pati Patni Jokes for WhatsApp
- Pati: Tum WhatsApp par hi busy kyun rehti ho?
Patni: Tumhare saath baat karne ka time nahi milta! - Patni: Status dekh ke laga tum mujhe miss kar rahe ho.
Pati: Woh toh network miss kar raha tha. - Pati: Tumhara DP kyun badla?
Patni: Tumhara mood badalne ke liye. - Patni: Mujhe tum block karne wale the?
Pati: Socha, ghar mein ho toh phone se door rakho. - Pati: Tum emojis zyada bhejti ho.
Patni: Tum emotions kam dikhate ho! - Pati: WhatsApp pe hi tum sab kuch share karti ho?
Patni: Tum se toh TV ke remote bhi share nahi hota! - Patni: Tumhare status mein ‘Single Life Rocks’ kya tha?
Pati: Throwback Thursday! - Pati: Group mein mujhe joke banaya?
Patni: Toh ghar mein reality dikhayi. - Pati: Good morning wish nahi aayi?
Patni: Tum WhatsApp ho ya husband? - Patni: Tumhare messages boring hote hain.
Pati: Tumhari lectures thrilling hote hain kya? - Pati: Tumne mujhe DP mein lagaya hai?
Patni: Tum wallpaper bhi nahi ho. - Patni: Tumne chat delete kyun ki?
Pati: Privacy ka mamla hai. - Pati: Tum mujhe seen pe chhod deti ho.
Patni: Tum toh life mein ignore karte ho. - Patni: Mujhe tumhare chats pyaare lagte hain.
Pati: Mujhe tumhare bills dikhte hain! - Pati: Tum WhatsApp pe hi zyada hasti ho.
Patni: Tum real life mein reason nahi ho. - Patni: Tumne last seen kyun chhupaya?
Pati: Tumhare mood swings se bacha jaaye. - Patni: Tum emojis hi bhejte ho.
Pati: Words se to fight hoti hai! - Pati: Tum mujhe ‘sweetheart’ likh ke bhejo.
Patni: Pehle tum ‘sweatshirt’ uthao! - Patni: WhatsApp pe tumhare pyaar wale messages kam ho gaye.
Pati: Data bhi toh khatam ho gaya. - Patni: Tumhara love story khatam ho gaya?
Pati: Forward message tha.
7. New Generation Husband Wife Jokes
- Pati: Tum online shopping shokeen ho.
Patni: Tum real life mein bore ho! - Patni: Netflix pe kya dekh rahe ho?
Pati: Tumhara future – silent films. - Pati: Tumhe Instagram reel banani aati hai?
Patni: Shaadi reel hi ban gayi hai. - Patni: Tum zyada tech savvy ho gaye ho.
Pati: Tum emotionally heavy ho. - Patni: Tum apps ke bina reh nahi sakte.
Pati: Tum fights ke bina? - Pati: Aaj dinner online order karein?
Patni: Tum bhi toh mera pyaar online karte ho. - Patni: Password kya rakha?
Pati: Tumhara mood! - Pati: Tum Wi-Fi ke bina gussa ho jaati ho.
Patni: Tum husband ho ya mobile tower? - Patni: Mera phone tumne kyun check kiya?
Pati: Tumhare bills bhi main check karta hoon! - Pati: Online classes ki wajah se tum busy ho?
Patni: Tumhari bakbak se free hoon!
8. Short Pati Patni One-Liner Jokes
- Patni ke khwab — Europe trip, Pati ka budget — local train.
- Pati: Tumse shaadi kar ke zindagi badal gayi!
Patni: Pehle achhi thi? - Patni: Tum badal gaye ho!
Pati: Ab EMI bhar raha hoon! - Pati: Tum mujhe samajhti nahi ho.
Patni: Tum likhe ho kya? - Patni: Tumse kuch kaam nahi hota!
Pati: Tumse kuch shaant nahi hota! - Pati: Khana bana?
Patni: Order kar lo. - Patni: Mujhe ghoomne jaana hai.
Pati: Bazaar tak chalein? - Pati: Tumhara mood kyun kharab hai?
Patni: Tum ho na? - Patni: Mujhe surprise chahiye.
Pati: Gas cylinder aaya! - Pati: Ghar ka mahaul thoda shaant ho.
Patni: Tum kaam pe jao. - Patni: Tumne mujhe kabhi samjha hi nahi!
Pati: Tum notes ho kya? - Pati: Tum khud ko heroine samajhti ho?
Patni: Aur tum villain se kam ho? - Patni: Mujhe shopping jana hai.
Pati: Dil ka daura dekhna hai? - Patni: Tum phone kyun nahi uthate?
Pati: Tumhara call hota hai! - Pati: Tumhara gussa kaise kam hoga?
Patni: Tum chhup ho jao. - Patni: Tum mujhe ignore karte ho.
Pati: Tum phone ki tarah lagti ho. - Pati: Tumne khana jalaya?
Patni: Tumhari tarah taste bhi gaya! - Patni: Tum kabhi help nahi karte!
Pati: Tum kabhi allow karti ho? - Pati: Tumhare jokes kam ho gaye hain.
Patni: Tum zyada ho gaye ho. - Patni: Tum mujhe samjho.
Pati: Tum riddle ho?
9. Desi Married Couple Jokes
- Pati: Tumhara swagat aisa hai jaise Income Tax ka notice.
- Patni: Tum shaadi ke baad badal gaye ho.
Pati: Tum bhi toh do log ban gayi ho — ghar mein aur phone pe. - Pati: Ghar ke decisions tumhi leti ho.
Patni: Kyunki tum so rahe hote ho! - Patni: Ghar mein silence nahi hota.
Pati: Tum mute mein kab hoti ho? - Pati: Tumhe har baat mein taana dena aata hai.
Patni: Gift ke saath free mein aayi hoon! - Patni: Main apne maa ke ghar ja rahi hoon!
Pati: Auto bula doon? - Pati: Tum dinner late deti ho.
Patni: Tum thanks jaldi bolte ho? - Patni: Mummy bolti thi shaadi ke baad sab theek hoga.
Pati: Mummy kabhi shaadi kiye hain? - Pati: Tumhara dimaag toh news se tez hai.
Patni: Tumhara dimaag remote se slow hai! - Patni: Tumhara tiffin hamesha bhool jaate ho.
Pati: Tumhara lecture nahi! - Pati: Tum mujhe jaleel karti ho.
Patni: Tum toh ready-made ho! - Patni: Tumhare jokes bore karte hain.
Pati: Tumhara gussa award jeet sakta hai. - Pati: Tum mujhe advice kam diya karo.
Patni: Tum galtiyan kam karo! - Patni: Tum office mein busy rehte ho.
Pati: Tum shopping mein free rehti ho? - Pati: Mere socks milte nahi.
Patni: Tumhari memory bhi! - Patni: Mere dresses par comment mat karo.
Pati: Tumhare bills bolte hain! - Pati: Tum kabhi relax nahi hoti.
Patni: Tum kabhi serious nahi hote! - Patni: Ghar ka kaam tumhare bas ka nahi.
Pati: Tumhara patience bhi nahi! - Pati: Tumhara mood swing karta hai.
Patni: Tumhara budget nahi! - Patni: Tum hamesha bahane banate ho.
Pati: Tumko mana karna mushkil hai!
10. Office Life and Married Life Jokes
- Pati: Office mein boss daanta hai.
Patni: Ghar mein main hoon! - Patni: Tum ghar late kyun aaye?
Pati: Boss ne overtime diya… tumne silence! - Pati: Office mein appreciation mila.
Patni: Ghar mein dishes mila! - Patni: Tum ghar aake kaam bhool jaate ho.
Pati: Ghar mein sab kuch yaad dilaya jaata hai! - Pati: Office mein chair achhi hoti hai.
Patni: Ghar mein cushion bhi tum se door bhaagta hai. - Patni: Tum boss ki baat sunte ho.
Pati: Tum toh command karti ho! - Pati: Office mein coffee free milti hai.
Patni: Ghar mein tension unlimited! - Patni: Tum lunch time pe phone nahi uthate.
Pati: Tum breakfast mein stress deti ho! - Pati: Office mein chhutti nahi milti.
Patni: Ghar mein sukoon nahi milta! - Patni: Tum har waqt meeting mein rehte ho.
Pati: Tumhara monologue bhi ek session hai. - Pati: Tum mujhe call nahi karti?
Patni: Tum whatsapp status check kar lo! - Patni: Tum stress lete ho?
Pati: Ghar ka naam hi tension hai. - Pati: Office mein har koi boss hai.
Patni: Ghar mein ek hi queen hai. - Patni: Tum ghar late aaye toh bataya kyun nahi?
Pati: Tumhara sawaal hi pehla punishment hai! - Pati: Tum mera calendar kabhi nahi dekhti.
Patni: Tum mera budget kabhi nahi samajhte! - Patni: Tum mujhe time nahi dete.
Pati: Tum meri battery nikal lete ho! - Pati: Office mein thoda peace hota hai.
Patni: Ghar mein reality hoti hai. - Patni: Tum boss ke liye ready ho jaate ho.
Pati: Tum shopping ke liye! - Pati: Tum har waqt gussa karti ho.
Patni: Tum har waqt kaam se bhaag jaate ho! - Patni: Tum itne lazy kyun ho?
Pati: Tumhara energy se dar lagta hai!
11. Naya Naya Shaadi Jokes
- Pati: Tumne mujhse pyar kyun kiya?
Patni: Kyunki mujhe adventure pasand hai. - Patni: Tum mujhe surprise doge?
Pati: Roz main surprise hoon — zinda hoon! - Pati: Shaadi ke baad zindagi slow lagti hai.
Patni: Kyunki remote ab mere paas hai! - Patni: Tum mujhe har waqt kyun dekhte ho?
Pati: Kyunki dar lagta hai kahin badal na jao! - Pati: Shaadi ek decision tha.
Patni: Tumhara ya galti? - Patni: Ab humesha saath rahenge.
Pati: Toh oxygen ka kya karein? - Pati: Tum breakfast mein kya logi?
Patni: Tumhari loyalty! - Patni: Tum late kyun aaye?
Pati: Soch raha tha shaadi pe discussion ho raha hoga. - Pati: Mere doston ne bola, ab zindagi badal gayi.
Patni: Sahi kaha, ab doston se milna mushkil hai! - Patni: Mummy ne bola, tum best ho.
Pati: Unhone best before date nahi dekhi! - Pati: Tum hamesha khush dikhte ho.
Patni: Tumhare stress se main energized hoon. - Patni: Tum mujhe samajhne ki koshish kab karoge?
Pati: Jab answer sheet milegi. - Pati: Tumhara dimaag kuch zyada tez hai.
Patni: Tumhara charger low hai! - Patni: Tumhare liye kya lekar aayi?
Pati: Aadhi azadi! - Pati: Shaadi ke baad time kahan gaya?
Patni: Tumhare wallet ke saath. - Patni: Tumhare shoes kahaan hain?
Pati: Tumhare mood ke niche! - Pati: Tumhara smile dangerous hai.
Patni: Warning label lagwa doon? - Patni: Tumhaare jaise aur milte honge.
Pati: Par lucky main hi hoon! - Pati: Shaadi se pehle sapne the.
Patni: Ab reality show chal raha hai! - Patni: Tum late kyun aaye ho?
Pati: Traffic nahi, tumhara gussa darrata hai!
12. Evening Time Pati Patni Comedy
- Patni: Tum ghar aake TV kyun dekhte ho?
Pati: Tum reality show ho, TV fiction hai. - Pati: Chai milegi kya?
Patni: Pyaar do, fir chai milegi. - Patni: Tum dinner ka wait nahi karte?
Pati: Tumhara gussa khana chura leta hai. - Pati: Tum mujhe ignore karti ho.
Patni: Tum remote ignore karte ho! - Patni: Har sham same jagah baithe ho!
Pati: Tum gussa wahi pe deti ho! - Pati: Aaj ka khana kaun banayega?
Patni: Jo sabse kam argue kare! - Patni: Tum office se directly kyu aaye?
Pati: Tumhara interrogation pending tha. - Pati: Tum thoda araam kar lo.
Patni: Tum thoda kaam kar lo! - Patni: Tum dinner mein kya loge?
Pati: Thoda pyar aur zyada sabzi. - Pati: Tumhe kaun si movie dekhni hai?
Patni: Tumhara guilt live show. - Patni: Tum late aaye ho?
Pati: Watch tumne gift ki thi! - Pati: Tumhare jokes boring hain.
Patni: Tumhare bills zyada thrilling hain! - Patni: Tum itne thak gaye ho?
Pati: Tumhare gussa ne sab energy le li. - Pati: Aaj bahar chalein?
Patni: Sabzi lane? - Patni: Har baar same khana kyun?
Pati: Tumhara mood bhi toh repeat hota hai. - Pati: Tum bartan kyun nahi dhoti?
Patni: Kyunki main tumhare zakhm nahi! - Patni: TV off karo.
Pati: Tumhara lecture start ho gaya? - Pati: Main so jaoon kya?
Patni: Pehle galti accept karo! - Patni: Tum hamesha excuses dete ho.
Pati: Tum hamesha evidence ready rakhti ho! - Pati: Shaam ko hum baith ke baat karein?
Patni: Tum sun paoge?
13. Weekend Married Life Jokes
- Patni: Weekend hai, movie chalein?
Pati: Tumhare mood ka interval kab hai? - Pati: Saturday ko kya plan hai?
Patni: Tumhare budget se bahar ka! - Patni: Aaj koi kaam nahi karungi.
Pati: Main toh roj tumhare sath hoon. - Pati: Sunday hai, thoda late utho.
Patni: Ghar tumhare kahne se nahi chalta! - Patni: Tum kabhi safai nahi karte.
Pati: Tum toh har weekend mujhe dho daalti ho! - Pati: Aaj sirf rest karunga.
Patni: Sapne mein bhi nahi! - Patni: Weekend shopping karni hai.
Pati: Dil ki surgery ready hai! - Pati: Ghar ka makeover karein?
Patni: Tumse shuru karein? - Patni: Tum breakfast banaoge?
Pati: Tumhne toh sab mood bana diya. - Pati: Sunday funday hai.
Patni: Tumhare liye, mere liye laundry day! - Patni: Tumhara plan kya hai?
Pati: Tumse permission lena! - Pati: Aaj match dekh sakta hoon?
Patni: Pehle dishes dekh lo! - Patni: Ghar ka kaam pending hai.
Pati: Mera rest bhi! - Pati: Thoda bahar ghoomne chalein?
Patni: Mall ke andar ghoom lo. - Patni: Tumhara weekend off hai.
Pati: Tumhara gussa on hai. - Pati: Weekend par peace chahiye.
Patni: Tab toh main mummy ke yahan jaaun? - Patni: Main bhi relax karna chahti hoon.
Pati: Tumhara relax aur mera torture ek hi baat hai! - Pati: Sunday ka kya plan hai?
Patni: Tumhara patience test karne ka! - Patni: Tum shopping mein bore hote ho?
Pati: Tumhare budget se bhi! - Pati: Aaj thoda romantic dinner karein?
Patni: Electricity ka bill bhara?
14. Budget Aur Expenses Pe Pati Patni Jokes
- Pati: Tum shopping ka bill dikhane se kyun darti ho?
Patni: Kyunki sach dard deta hai! - Patni: Budget kahan gaya?
Pati: Tumhare handbag ke neeche! - Pati: Tum itna kharch kaise kar leti ho?
Patni: Tumhara pyar dikhana padta hai! - Patni: Paise bachane ka plan hai kya?
Pati: Tumhara shopping band ho toh ho sakta hai! - Pati: Har mahine budget ka postmortem kyun hota hai?
Patni: Tumhare decisions se! - Patni: EMI bharne ki date hai.
Pati: Aur tumhara shopping list ready hai! - Pati: Tumhara online order fir aa gaya!
Patni: Offers miss nahi karti main. - Patni: Bachpan se savings sikhaya gaya.
Pati: Shaadi ke baad bhool gayi? - Pati: Kharch thoda kam karo.
Patni: Tum mood kharab mat karo! - Patni: Ghar ka kharcha tum manage nahi karte?
Pati: Tumhare demands manage nahi hote! - Pati: Bank balance ka kya haal hai?
Patni: Tumhare bharose tha! - Patni: Shopping karte waqt budget yaad rakha karo.
Pati: Tum karta karti toh aaj billionaire hote! - Pati: Tumhara fashion sense mehenga padta hai.
Patni: Tumhara logic sense sasta hai! - Patni: Ghar ka ration khatam ho gaya.
Pati: Tumhara lipstick nahi! - Pati: Har sale mein tum active kyun ho?
Patni: Dil se shopper hoon! - Patni: Monthly expenses ka kya plan hai?
Pati: Tumhare upar bharosa nahi! - Pati: Paisa bachao toh ghar chale.
Patni: Tumhara mood bachao, shaanti rahe! - Patni: Tum kahte ho main zyada kharch karti hoon.
Pati: Tum maan bhi jao kabhi! - Pati: Aaj ka bill toh shocking tha.
Patni: Tumhara reaction aur zyada shocking hai! - Patni: Tum financial planning seekho.
Pati: Tum planning follow karo!
15. Cooking Aur Kitchen Pati Patni Jokes
- Pati: Aaj kya bana hai?
Patni: Tumhara patience test! - Patni: Tumhe khana pasand aaya?
Pati: Zinda hoon, yeh kaafi hai. - Pati: Recipe kiski thi?
Patni: Dushman ki! - Patni: Kitchen ka saman le aana.
Pati: List mein mere naam bhi likh do! - Pati: Tumhara banaya khana alag hota hai.
Patni: Kyunki surprise element hota hai. - Patni: Tumhari complaint kya hai?
Pati: Taste aur timing! - Pati: Tumhe cooking ka award milna chahiye.
Patni: Kyunki main tumse jeeti hoon? - Patni: Tum khana banake dekho!
Pati: Toh poison ka option rakho! - Pati: Aaj ka lunch thoda different tha.
Patni: Kyunki tum bhukh zyada le aaye the! - Patni: Kitchen clean kyun nahi kiya?
Pati: Khana to phir se banta hai! - Pati: Tumhara masala alag hota hai.
Patni: Tumhara mood bhi toh salty hai! - Patni: Recipe follow karo.
Pati: Tumhari instructions confuse karti hai! - Pati: Aaj ki daal mein dum hai.
Patni: Tumhare gusse ka taste hai! - Patni: Khud banao, agar problem hai.
Pati: Toh hospital ka contact bhi do! - Pati: Tumhara khana international standard ka hai.
Patni: Taste bhi internationally missing hai! - Patni: Khana waste kyun kiya?
Pati: Zindagi bachani thi! - Pati: Tumhara banaya breakfast healthy tha.
Patni: Kyunki usme taste nahi tha! - Patni: Tum khud chef ban jao.
Pati: Toh tum critic ban jao! - Pati: Kitchen mein time lagta hai.
Patni: Tumhara review aur time leta hai! - Patni: Tumko khana banana sikhana padega.
Pati: Tumse gussa banana toh seekh gaya!
16. TV Remote Ke Upar Jokes
- Pati: Remote mujhe do.
Patni: Main bhi tumhari zindagi ki remote hoon! - Patni: Tum sirf news dekhte ho.
Pati: Kyunki drama tum provide karti ho! - Pati: Har waqt serial kaun dekhta hai?
Patni: Jo real life mein bore ho! - Patni: TV chhodo, kuch aur karo.
Pati: Tumse argue hi toh kar raha hoon. - Pati: Match dekhne do.
Patni: Tumse har baar haar jaati hoon! - Patni: Remote chhup gaya kya?
Pati: Tumhare attitude ke neeche! - Pati: Channel change karna padega.
Patni: Mood bhi badalna padega! - Patni: Tum remote ke peeche pagal ho.
Pati: Tum mood ke peeche! - Pati: Aaj mera turn hai.
Patni: Toh main kitchen ka remote loongi! - Patni: Har show boring hai.
Pati: Tumhare dialogues nahi? - Pati: Tum TV ki heroine se jealous ho?
Patni: Nahi, uski husband se! - Patni: Remote ka control mere paas hai.
Pati: Zindagi ka bhi! - Pati: Volume kam karo!
Patni: Tumhare gusse ki tarah? - Patni: Tum TV band karo.
Pati: Tum mood on karo! - Pati: Tumhaare TV shows endless hain.
Patni: Tumhara gussa bhi! - Patni: Remote mil gaya?
Pati: Tumhare attitude ke andar chhupa tha! - Pati: TV pe kuch accha aaya kya?
Patni: Tumhara mood change! - Patni: Tum remote chor ho.
Pati: Tum emotion chor! - Pati: Channel change karun?
Patni: Tum change ho jao! - Patni: Remote kyun chhupa kar rakhte ho?
Pati: Safety ke liye!
17. Shaadi Ke Pehle Aur Baad Ke Jokes
- Pati: Shaadi se pehle tum har baat pe muskurati thi.
Patni: Shaadi ke baad wajah mil gayi rulane ki! - Patni: Pehle tum itne sweet the!
Pati: Pehle tum bhi shopping mein discount dekhte thi! - Pati: Tum badal gayi ho.
Patni: Tumhare bank balance ki tarah! - Patni: Tum pehle mujhe rose diya karte the.
Pati: Ab toh EMI ka bill deta hoon! - Pati: Pehle mujhe “Jaan” bulati thi.
Patni: Ab tum samajh jao, kaafi hai! - Patni: Pehle main tumhara dream thi.
Pati: Ab toh nightmare ho gayi! - Pati: Pehle tum roz phone karti thi.
Patni: Ab toh roz electricity ka bill sunati hoon! - Patni: Tum pehle mujhe ghumoate the.
Pati: Ab toh main budget ghumaata hoon! - Pati: Shaadi ke baad zindagi change ho gayi.
Patni: Tumhara ringtone bhi! - Patni: Pehle tum mujhe priority dete the.
Pati: Ab toh Wi-Fi se pehle tum aati ho! - Pati: Shaadi se pehle life peaceful thi.
Patni: Tumhara face bhi glowing tha! - Patni: Mujhe yaad hai pehli baar mile the.
Pati: Aur mujhe yaad hai akhri baar haste the! - Pati: Pehle movie night hoti thi.
Patni: Ab toh shopping night hoti hai! - Patni: Pehle tum mujhe surprise dete the.
Pati: Ab toh tum surprise attack karti ho! - Pati: Pehle tum coffee banati thi.
Patni: Ab toh complaint file karti ho! - Patni: Shaadi ke baad tum bore ho gaye.
Pati: Tumhare daily soap ke jaise! - Pati: Pehle tum romantic thi.
Patni: Tum budget friendly the! - Patni: Shaadi ke pehle khush the.
Pati: Shaadi ke baad budget tight hai! - Pati: Tumhara behaviour pehle different tha.
Patni: Tumhara patience bhi tha! - Patni: Shaadi ne sab kuch badal diya.
Pati: Haan, password bhi!
18. Pati Patni Ke Emotional Jokes
- Pati: Tum ro kyun rahi ho?
Patni: Tumhare attitude se! - Patni: Tumhare bina main adhoori hoon.
Pati: EMI bhi tumhare bina adhoori hai! - Pati: Main tumhare liye kuch bhi kar sakta hoon.
Patni: Toh shopping chalo! - Patni: Mujhe surprise chahiye.
Pati: Tumhare bills hi kaafi hain! - Pati: Main tumse pyar karta hoon.
Patni: Main bhi tumse tolerate karti hoon! - Patni: Tum itne rude kyun ho?
Pati: Tumhare logic se! - Pati: Tumhara mood off kyun hai?
Patni: Tumhare words ki wajah se! - Patni: Main ghar sambhalti hoon.
Pati: Main tumhare tantrums! - Pati: Main tumhe hurt nahi karna chahta.
Patni: Par tum kar hi lete ho! - Patni: Tumhare bina main kuch nahi.
Pati: Toh bank ka PIN de do! - Pati: Tumhare aansu mujhe dukh dete hain.
Patni: Toh gift de do! - Patni: Tumhara pyar genuine hai?
Pati: Jitna tumhara shopping bill! - Pati: Tum bahut caring ho.
Patni: Tum thoda daring ho! - Patni: Mujhe ignore mat karo.
Pati: Tum volume low karo! - Pati: Tum emotional blackmail karti ho.
Patni: Tum logic se maarte ho! - Patni: Mera dard tum samajhte ho?
Pati: EMI bharte waqt yaad aata hai! - Pati: Tum mere liye duniya ho.
Patni: Aur tum TV remote ho! - Patni: Mere jazbaat ki kadar karo.
Pati: Tumhara dialogue repeat hai! - Pati: Tum ro mat.
Patni: Toh shopping kara do! - Patni: Tumhara pyar hi meri zindagi hai.
Pati: Tumhara budget meri maut!
Best Pati Patni Jokes in Hindi
- पत्नी: सुनिए, शादी से पहले आप मुझे चाँद तारे तोड़कर लाने की बात करते थे।
पति: तब की बात और थी, अब तो बिजली का बिल तोड़ता हूँ! - पति: आज खाना बहुत स्वादिष्ट बना है।
पत्नी: तो कल से रोज़ यही बनाऊं?
पति: नहीं-नहीं, गलती से बोल दिया था! - पत्नी: मैं मायके जा रही हूं!
पति: रास्ते में कुछ सब्ज़ी भी लेते आना 😜 - पति: तुम्हें क्या चाहिए ज़िंदगी में?
पत्नी: तुम्हारा ATM कार्ड और शांति! - पत्नी: मैं सुंदर लग रही हूं ना?
पति: जवाब देने से पहले ये बताओ खाना किसने बनाया है? 😅 - पति: तुम्हारे गुस्से का कोई इलाज है?
पत्नी: हां, तुम्हारी समझदारी! - पत्नी: तुम मुझे कितना प्यार करते हो?
पति: उतना ही जितना Wi-Fi के बिना मोबाइल से करता हूं। - पति: आज क्या स्पेशल बना है खाने में?
पत्नी: तुम्हारे लिए ‘डायट खाना’ — यानी कुछ भी नहीं! 😂 - पति: मेरी ज़िंदगी तबाह हो गई…
दोस्त: क्यों भाई?
पति: शादी कर ली! - पत्नी: मैं कौन सी लगती हूं तुम्हारी?
पति: GPS… हर समय रास्ता बताती रहती हो! 🤣 - पति: शादी के पहले तू परी थी…
पत्नी: और अब?
पति: अब परांठा बन गई है! - पति: मुझे तुमसे कुछ कहना है।
पत्नी: बोलो ना…
पति: ज़रा धीरे बोला करो! - पत्नी: तुम मेरे बिना अधूरे हो।
पति: और तुम मेरे बिना खर्चे अधूरे हैं! - पति: मेरी लाइफ खराब कर दी!
पत्नी: तुमने शादी करके मुझे भी अकेला नहीं छोड़ा! - पत्नी: मैं मायके जा रही हूं!
पति: ज़रा जोर से बोलो… पड़ोसी भी खुश हो जाएं! - पति: रात को मच्छर बहुत काटते हैं।
पत्नी: तो दिन में मैं क्या करती हूं? - पति: तुमसे शादी करके मेरी किस्मत खुल गई।
पत्नी: हां, अब सबकुछ बाहर का खाना खुल गया! - पति: मैं ऑफिस जा रहा हूं।
पत्नी: जाते हुए डस्टबिन भी फेंक देना! - पत्नी: सुनो जी, आपके लिए क्या लाऊं मार्केट से?
पति: थोड़ी सी शांति और समझदारी! 😜 - पति: तुम्हारे लिए जान भी दे सकता हूं!
पत्नी: पहले थोड़ा टाइम दे दो!
19. Night Time Pati Patni Jokes
- Pati: Aaj jaldi so jao.
Patni: Kyunki sapna tumhare budget ka aayega? - Patni: Bed pe thoda space do.
Pati: Tumhare kapdon ke liye bhi chhota pad gaya! - Pati: Tumhare snore mujhe sula dete hain.
Patni: Tumhara silence mujhe jagata hai! - Patni: Light off karo.
Pati: Tumhara lecture on reh jaata hai! - Pati: Tum dreams mein bhi shopping karti ho.
Patni: Toh EMI dream mein bhar do! - Patni: Tum raat ko itna ghoorte ho.
Pati: Kyunki tumhar mood unpredictable hota hai! - Pati: Tumhare blankets conquer kar liya.
Patni: Tumhare space mein expansion hai! - Patni: Pillow mera hai.
Pati: Tumhara volume bhi! - Pati: Tumhe sapne mein kya dikhta hai?
Patni: Tumhara debit card! - Patni: Tum mobile leke kyun so rahe ho?
Pati: Tumhare shopping alerts ke liye! - Pati: Tum jaldi soti ho.
Patni: Tum late aaye toh! - Patni: Tumhare alarm annoying hai.
Pati: Tumhara gussa aur zyada! - Pati: Tumhare dreams romantic hain?
Patni: Tum budget ke sapne laate ho! - Patni: Tumhare snore se earthquake lagta hai!
Pati: Tumhare shopping se tsunami! - Pati: Night mein peace chahiye.
Patni: Tumhara statement peaceful nahi! - Patni: Tumhare socks kaha hain?
Pati: Tumhare sarcasm ke neeche! - Pati: Raat ko TV band karo.
Patni: Tumhare remote ki band bajao? - Patni: Tum bed pe lecture kyun dete ho?
Pati: Tum alarm ho jo kabhi off nahi hota! - Pati: Tumhare goodnight mein sarcasm hota hai.
Patni: Tumhare goodmorning mein bhi! - Patni: Tum bed pe disturb karte ho.
Pati: Tum shanti se bhi tang karti ho!
20. Office Aur Work-Life Pati Patni Jokes
- Pati: Office stress leke aaya hoon.
Patni: Tumhare liye ghar aur bhi stressful hai! - Patni: Tum office mein itne busy kyun ho?
Pati: Kyunki ghar mein tum free ho! - Pati: Boss ne daanta aaj.
Patni: Ab tum meri practice se immune ho gaye! - Patni: Tum ghar pe kaam kyun nahi karte?
Pati: Tum office ka stress hi kaafi ho! - Pati: Mujhe work-from-home chahiye.
Patni: Tumhare mood-from-office jaise hi hai! - Patni: Tum late kyun aaye?
Pati: Tumhare attitude se bachne! - Pati: Boss ka call aaya.
Patni: Tumhara tone already office style hai! - Patni: Tum meeting mein busy ho?
Pati: Tumhari planning se zyada important hai! - Pati: Office mein promotion mila.
Patni: Ghar mein bhi milega kya? - Patni: Tum phone off kyun karte ho?
Pati: Tumhara mood disturb na ho! - Pati: Tum meri job samjho.
Patni: Tum meri life samjho! - Patni: Tum sirf salary laate ho.
Pati: Tum expense laati ho! - Pati: Tumhare liye kaam chhod sakta hoon.
Patni: Par ghar ke liye bhi kuch karo! - Patni: Tum boss ke dar se kaam karte ho?
Pati: Tumhare mood se zyada! - Pati: Tumhara budget har office trip pe toot jaata hai.
Patni: Tumhare mood har bill pe! - Patni: Tum kaam mein lage rehte ho.
Pati: Tum complaints mein! - Pati: Office mein log appreciate karte hain.
Patni: Ghar mein complaint register! - Patni: Tum kaam ka stress ghar le aate ho.
Pati: Tumhare dialogues ka! - Pati: Main resign de doon?
Patni: Nahi, main vacation le loon! - Patni: Tum boss se dosti kyun nahi karte?
Pati: Tumse daily war ho jata hai!
FAQs
Q1. Kya yeh jokes sabhi age groups ke liye suitable hain?
Ans: Haan, ye family-friendly jokes hain jo har age group ko hansane ke liye banaye gaye hain.
Q2. Kya main in jokes ko WhatsApp par share kar sakta hoon?
Ans: Bilkul! Aap in jokes ko apne friends aur family ke sath freely share kar sakte hain.
Q3. Kya yeh jokes copyright-free hain?
Ans: Haan, yeh original content hai aur public use ke liye banaya gaya hai.
Q4. Kya yeh jokes offline bhi use kiye ja sakte hain?
Ans: Haan, aap inhe print karke ya offline events mein bhi use kar sakte hain.
Q5. Kya aur bhi similar articles mil sakte hain?
Ans: Haan, aap hamare site par aur bhi husband-wife, teacher-student, aur Santa-Banta jokes ke articles padh sakte hain.
Conclusion
Pati Patni ka rishta sirf pyar ka hi nahi, taano aur hassi ka bhi hota hai. In 501+ Pati Patni Jokes 2025 ke zariye humne koshish ki aapke chehre par muskan laayein. Har joke ek chhoti si yaad, ek chhoti si nok-jhok, aur ek bade pyar ki nishani hai. Is article ko apne doston ke sath share karke, hansi ka dose zaroor baantna!
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